MARCH 30 2010 1403 - JACKSONVILLE FL - Today is a rather somber day for me. It should be a joyous day as a preparation to celebrate the birth of my father, but this day will be forever etched in my mind as the day my mother passed away.
Regrets, some people have few. Me? I have many regrets, but the greatest of all of my regrets is the fact that my mother went to her grave without me being able to tell her while she was still alive that I loved her. Please forgive the run on sentence, but this is an emotional time in my life.
My mother and I seldom saw eye to eye, and a great part of that was driven by my own stupidity. I could have listened more, but my pride would not allow me to. This is my personal lamentation, for I will never have another woman in my life like my mother.
Only one of my wives ever knew my mother, and believe me, Julia feared the presence of my mother. Perhaps that was because she realized she would never measure up to my mother.
At times, my daughter, in her firness reminds me of my mother, but I pass that off one of my mother's traits that I shared with my daughter. In many ways I am like my mother.
She would give even when she had not the means, yet would ask nothing in return. The truest example of a saint to me, indeed one that I would aspire to be.
I miss my mother more than worlds can ever say, and yet I realize that she is not more than a simple prayer away. It's been 21 years since that fateful day. This day. The day my mother passed away.
I love you mom, and even though I had a strange way of showing it, I always have loved you.
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